Day... I've Lost Count. 12? Oh my gosh, I've stuck to something for 12 days!?

I have been having the weirdest sleeping patterns. I go to bed fine but I'm waking up early for no reason whatsoever and have really weird and bizarre dreams. I've cut back on caffeine, so I don't feel like it's that. Today I'm not going to have any caffeine except for my first Diet Coke and see if that helps tonight. It could be the Benadryl but I don't think so. If anything, that should make me sleep more. It's really annoying me. Yesterday I had to be up for school at 8:30 and woke up at 7. I *never* have problems sleeping. If being skinny means insomnia, then I'm gonna be fat. I'll just put that out there right now. Maybe when your body is starving it wants you to be awake and to eat...

I was sick all weekend and that sucked, but I did try the Medifast soups and they are deeeeelicious. I've discovered McDonald's salads and they haven't disappointed. Last time I had a salad there they were these small pathetic trays and didn't have chicken or anything. It was a long time ago. Now they are pretty tasty, I have to say. The chicken is really good. I was in San Marcos last night until 10:30 so I had to improvise and that's what I ended up getting. Admittedly, I ate the two club crackers it came with too. I don't regret it. They were salty and amazing. I was so hungry by the time we got to McDonald's that I was raging and wanting to eat everything on the menu and saying "I'm just gonna get normal food." But I knew it was most likely my stomach talking for me and so I said "okay, well I'll get the salad and if I'm hungry after, I'll get something good." Of course, I was not hungry after it. I think that shows how important it is to eat every 2-3 hours on a regular basis, Medifast aside. Unfortunately, with the crazy schedules everyone has these days, most people are lucky to even fit lunch in at all. When I worked in an office setting, I tried doing 5 small meals a day. Well, I would be good up until lunch when I went to the cafeteria with my coworkers and got a regular sized lunch because they all were. It always sabotaged me. If I were to have that problem now, I'd probably take a walk during lunch or go sit outside, instead of sitting at a table with people who are eating heaping plates of pasta. It was a social thing. Try to find a social event without food, let's be honest.

I'm getting frustrated because I feel like I don't have a lot of clothing options. My normal clothes are baggy. My old skinny clothes are too small. Today I'm wearing jeans that fit, but they are annoying and show my buttcrack when I sit. I should probably just resort to leggings but I only have so many shirts that go with leggings. And I'm not going to buy NEW clothes that fit me right now and won't fit in a month. I did buy a suit for school that is snug right now but should fit by business leadership week. Hopefully it'll fit by the end of this too because it was expensive. Well, it was discounted but the original price is expensive haha It was a size 8, which is weird because a size 8 shouldn't even be able to button or zip right now. I wanted to grab a 6 once I saw how it fit right now before I've even lost a significant amount but they didn't have it in that size unless I wanted some cheap crappy suit.

I have a desire for pasta and bread, but it's kind of fading to be honest. I enjoyed going out to eat on Friday, but it really wasn't all that exciting and I wasn't hungry the next day at all, it kind of threw me off. I don't want to eat anything that is going to weigh me down (no pun intended) the next few days. As much as Olive Garden beckons haha I figure I'll avoid that place for a while. I need to be in the 150s before I'll even consider it.

MEDIFAST ROCKS!!!

I'm adding pictures just for the sake of documentation, even though I don't see myself losing so much that I look drastically different in random pics. I always thought I'd do week by week pictures in a swimsuit or something but I really haven't cared to lol Whatever. I'll just use random pictures whenever I feel like it. I'd say you can't really tell except for maybe in my face.

Before starting

Day 11

First Week Results

My weight this morning is... *drum roll* 165! On the dot. 4.8 lbs lost this first week (ah, .2 lbs for a solid 5, darn it!) I haven't seen that number in probably years. I'd venture to say 4 years. I usually get caught up at 168 for some reason. It's really exciting. My clothes are already fitting differently and I can't wait to do another week. The first two weeks are the biggest losses so I'm hoping I can get another good number so I'm starting out high. I'm 20 away from my goal now (145). So hey, even if I only pull 2s from now on, 10 weeks and I should be there :)

There was another big achievement this week too. Last night Brian and I went out to eat at our favorite restaurant. We had meant to do it tonight AFTER weigh-in but I ended up having to work so it just worked out better to do it last night. And I thought I'd be more accountable for what I ate if I did it right before my Week 1 Weigh-In. We headed to the restaurant when I was due for my next meal and it was pushing 4.5 hours by the time we got seated. I was seriously freaking out I was so hungry. I'm basically a newborn now and if I hit 3 hours and haven't eaten, it's bad. When we normally go here, I probably can eat 4-6 rolls, at that level of hungry. I actually didn't have a lot of problems wanting the rolls. I ate one and a half to keep myself from freaking out. But once my stomach felt better I stopped. They weren't filling, they didn't taste nearly as good as I remembered, and I knew there was no nutritional value to them. We ordered immediately since we knew what we wanted. I got the chicken caesar salad (ah yes, the worst salad of them all). I get it every time. Only this time, I ate all of the chicken and half of the salad part because of the dressing. Since I'm supposed to have two servings of fat a day as it is, I would say the only real off-plan food was the 1.5 rolls. But given I ate... 1/4 of what I normally would, I feel zero guilt. I probably kicked myself out of ketosis for a couple days, but we'll see. That's the main reason I avoided the rolls, carbs are the worst for fat burning on this program. I woke up today full, didn't feel like eating but I had to. Today I'm gonna have to force myself to eat before my stomach gurgles, which is what I'm used to now. After dinner last night I don't have that gurgling feeling (oh wait, you mean, starving? lol). And I didn't even eat as much as I usually do there. I feel bloated just from that small amount of bread though. 

I'm coming down with a cold, which is super annoying. I popped a bunch of supplements so hopefully that helps. My body is so weak on this program. Walking up stairs practically cramps my legs. I keep wanting to make an excuse to people and be like "oh, I'm eating 900 calories a day" so they don't think I'm totally out of shape. Because I swear, I might be overweight (am I anymore? Oh okay, I am, just checked my BMI. .4 BMI points away from NORMAL), but I can walk up stairs without getting winded normally HAHA In a week I will be starting to work out. I wanted to start with toning exercises, but I *might* try jogging. My body is restless for activity with all this protein and no activity besides carrying the baby or walking in between classes. My goal weight is right smack dab in the middle of normal weight for my height. I calculate my height to the exact measure. I am 5 feet and 7.75 inches lol I feel like stretching to 5'8 is cheating. But 5'7 is just ripping me off of a decent BMI. Truth be told, I don't care for the BMI all that much. It doesn't account for body types (large framed here) or muscles (yeah, I don't have any of those yet). But it's still a goal on the big list of goals.

I'm thinking about buying ketone strips that tell me when I'm in ketosis, or the fat burning stage. Thoughts?

I would like to say that I have the most supportive boyfriend on the planet. We don't eat any of the same foods as it is, he hates my trigger foods (pasta and pizza) and would rather survive on meat than anything else. But he's been making an effort to buy healthier foods for himself as well, so I don't feel like I'm completely alone in this and I don't have to watch him eat chips or smell anything too delicious. Although, even the meat he cooks smells good at this stage in the game. I can now probably guarantee that if I was on Survivor and won a challenge where they gave us meat of some sort, I'd probably eat it without hesitation. I've done the "I want pasta, screw this diet, I'd rather eat what I want and be fat" speech several times just to blow off steam and he pulls my rational side out with his "well you have to do this because you already paid for another 4 weeks." Touche. Nothing feels better than stepping on the scale and seeing numbers that are foreign to me. Or trying on jeans from 2009 that I haven't worn because they were so tight and uncomfortable and now they are just fine. Or throwing my old jeans on the floor because they won't stop falling down. OR fitting into the Big Bang Theory shirt I bought that was out of stock in my size so I bought a size or two smaller and figured I'd fit into it at the end of this journey (or the first week). Oh and lastly, my bras are fitting more comfortably. I can't wait to go shopping once I've lost more. I'm having a dilemma though because I really need a suit for school (business school) and interviews (graduating in May). Heck if I'm paying 300 dollars for something that won't fit in 2 months. Maybe I'll wait a month and then buy one that is snug. 

Day 7!

Sorry if I haven't been updating regularly. I'm still here. There just isn't much to update and I've been busy with school and work. Tomorrow is Week 1 weigh in. I've weighed myself twice this week so I sort of know where it's gonna be but I'll leave that as a surprise for tomorrow. I don't think I'll measure tomorrow since inches take a while, I'll probably do that every other week.

It's been hard to eat the same foods over and over. Sometimes after my last meal I just sit on the couch thinking about food I want to eat and then it's time for bed before I can actually eat anything haha I wouldn't say I am craving anything. Although last night I all of a sudden wanted a Taco Bell quesadilla. Which I don't even eat often... I have lots of energy and caffeine has started affecting me more. Also, any medications like Benadryl kick my butt on so little calories.

It's difficult trying to eat my meals at schools, except the bars. At one point yesterday I had 10 minutes to go to the bathroom (which I do constantly with so much water), refill my water bottle, eat a bag of Medifast cereal, and run clear across campus for my next class. Most of my classes don't allow food, so it's a juggling act to make sure my meals are in between classes without waiting too long to eat or eating too soon. Last semester I would've eaten a bag of chips before class and probably not again until the end of classes. Sometimes I'd drink a regular coke, which I hate, just for the calories to feel full in class. Ooh healthy.

My normal jeans don't fit good anymore, they're to the point where I have to pull them up every five seconds so pretty much can't wear them. I have a feeling I'm gonna get good use of my leggings the next couple months... Lol

Okay well I'll post week 1 results tomorrow!

Day 3

I am starving. Not really though. I'm more grumbly than what I would consider starving. Whatever, let it feel what it's like to not be full of bread and pasta. Drinking plenty of water to feel full. I went through a Burger King drive thru for a Diet Coke today and it was so tempting, but I persevered. I don't think I'm gonna make that a habit because why torture myself? I thought the diet would be harder at home, but it actually seems harder at work and school. The reason is I have so many habits I didn't realize. Like stopping at the vending machines on my way up to my evening class. Or at work, snacking on whatever the baby eats. I actually stuck a cube of cheese in my mouth absentmindedly before spitting it out when I realized I wasn't supposed to be eating that. I weighed myself this morning and it was down a lot so I'm feeling really motivated. I'm kind of in a funk tonight though, but it's most likely the first week of school stress and unrelated to Medifast. Normally I would order a pizza to make myself feel better. Sooooo what now? Haha. I never considered myself an emotional eater. Most people who are know they are. But I think it's a subconscious thing for me. Stress just isn't as bad with a full stomach haha.

This is my last semester, so I need to just suck it up and stop freaking out like I always do the first week. There's just so many dates thrown at you, it's overwhelming. And then the fact that I work three days a week. Of course, I had to take an extra job on Saturday. I wanted to say no, but I didn't. I knew it was a bad idea because I would have a lot to get done this weekend. Sometimes I just have these days where life is so overwhelming. I am so thankful this is my last semester! I don't think I can do it anymore haha Having six classes is just a nightmare. Even if I tell myself "straight Cs are fine," I STILL stress out. Heck, technically, straight Ds are fine in order to graduate in May. I'm just one of those people who likes to do everything as good as I can. Here I am, printing Syllabuses (Syllabai?) and making sure my bag is ready for tomorrow and worrying about where my classes are. I'm gonna be just fine. What I SHOULD do is turn the tv on and relax and put my bag together in the morning. Anyway, this is turning into a blog about how stressed out I am, when that isn't its purpose.

I'm hungry. I've lost weight. I feel like my skin looks healthier. I have been a huge ditz today, forgetting everything. I might eat an extra bar to keep from killing someone right now. The good news is my stomach is hungry, but my brain isn't.

Day One

This post is a little late tonight because I went to karaoke and I just got home. No, I didn't drink, I'm not a moron =)

This morning was my first weigh-in. Here are the details.
Weight: 169.8
Muscle: 98.8 lbs
Chest: 40
Waist: 32
Hips: 43
Thighs: 25

My scale also says I burn 2400 calories a day. Of course, this is just based on my age, weight, height, etc. It doesn't account for genetics (slow/fast metabolism) which I have no clue what I am compared to other people. I eat pretty bad for not being obese... haha so maybe a little fast.

I woke up and had a glass of water and one of the bars after weighing myself. The bar was delicious. Small, yes. And I wasn't full after. But I just kept drinking water until the next meal. Brian annoyed me and I said "Hey! Don't mess with me, I'm hungry!" He said "Hungry, you just ate." Hahahaha. That should be my motto for the next week. Two hours later, I had the macaroni and cheese. Um... disgusting. It smelled like dog throw up. Brian actually smelled it and thought one of the dogs had pooed in the house. I could handle eating it, but it was definitely not what I expected. Too bad I bought 21 packets of it! Down the hatch, I suppose. This is one of the first times I have eaten strictly for nourishment. I'm eating for energy and that's new for me. I did catch myself getting up after watching a show and wanting to search for food for no reason except that it's a habit to do so. So two hours later, I had some of the parmesan cheese puffs. These were tolerable, especially after the macaroni and cheese. They did take vitamin-y and there was so many that it took a while to eat (which is good, but not great when I have to take stuff to school). After this meal, I took a nap. I woke up and had another bar right away since it was pushing three hours from my last meal. After this bar, I waited two hours and then started making my lean & green meal. But wait, what happened to the 5th Medifast meal? It was 7:30 by this time and I didn't want to eat too late so I mixed one of the Tropical Punch drinks which counts as a meal and drank it while I cooked the chicken. This probably isn't technically how you should do the program, and I wouldn't make a habit of it, but I thought it was better to have the protein and calories shortly before my lean and green meal than to not have them at all. The tropical punch was interesting, good, but kind of thick for what I consider a "punch." The lean & green meal ended up being my favorite meal of the day, obviously. I cooked cut up chicken breast in canola oil (two servings of fat allowed per day) and garlic powder. Then I added 3 servings of green pepper as required for the "green" part of the meal. It was sooo good, I ate it slowly because I knew it was my last meal of the night. This was around 8:30 pm.

I got a call from a friend to go to karaoke and I was thinking, ugh, should I go out? I can't drink because alcohol really messes with the entire program. Plus, shouldn't I be tired? But I wasn't. So I decided to go. I guzzled Diet Coke the entire time, which yes, is allowed. I'm trying to replace it with water for a lot of the day because it'll make me hungrier and the sodium in it, but I also don't want to stop drinking it and have caffeine withdrawals while I'm hungry. Plus, it's so tasty when all you're eating is bland food all day. I wasn't any more tired than usual, but I did get winded quite easily when I attempted to dance. It could've been in my head that I didn't have the energy to be dancing, but either way, I stopped after one song. I'd like to avoid burning extra calories this week.

I honestly feel great. I thought I would feel sluggish and crappy, and I'm sure I will tomorrow and the next day. But I'm doing great today. I have thought about pasta and cheese a few times today, but I haven't had a strong urge to actually get any. My head is in the game and with how much I paid for this food, I'm going to lose weight eating the foods I bought. But I'm not going to fall off the wagon on the first day. How sad would that be... I hope every day is as easy as today. My tummy is grumbling, I should've gone to bed a looong time ago given that I ate at 8:30. Hopefully I can wake up at a decent hour so I'm not sleeping through meals tomorrow and doubling up like that. I'll just have to eat later if that's the case. Cause I need to sleep. It's going to take all my self control not to weigh in the morning. But I'd rather see a big number in a week than a tiny one (or zero) tomorrow.

Pregame

I'm starting Medifast in the morning. I'm more excited than nervous. Honestly, I got the food in the mail yesterday and I can't wait to eat it, it looks delicious. Hey, maybe it won't be. But at least I won't be fat anymore! Haha

So for anyone who doesn't know what Medifast is, I'll give you a simple breakdown of the program. The plan is called the 5 & 1 plan. 5 Medifast meals a day, and 1 Lean & Green meal. Medifast meals are ordered online through Take Shape for Life and come prepackaged. Take Shape for Life is a more support oriented way of doing Medifast (um, hello, necessary!) I have known Michelle, my health coach, for 4 years now and after seeing her results on the program, decided I wanted to do it too. Which worked out perfectly because she had decided to become a health coach at TSFL. Somehow knowing there would be someone on my side and asking if I lost weight each week made me feel good about the program. Some of my personal selections for food were macaroni and cheese, soup, bars, pretzel bites, and shakes. From what I understand, you can order the food in a great big variety pack and it's somewhat cheaper, but being a picky eater, I just chose my own 20 boxes of food (4 weeks worth). With this large purchase I got a week of food free. The food came in two days with expedited shipping (10 dollars). So I now have 5 weeks of food sitting on my shelf. Well, 5 weeks of the Medifast meals. The lean & green meal for me will consist of preportioned chicken breast and green beans/green peppers/lettuce (green veggies... get it... green?) since I don't eat any meat except chicken. I found a Weight Watchers pack of chicken for 5 bucks. 

Here it is... 5 weeks of meals. Brian says this wouldn't last him a week. It probably wouldn't normally last me a week either. That's why I'm here :)

The great thing about the program is no one cuts you off after you're done losing weight. There is a transition month where you start adding other foods into your diet and during the maintenance period, you stay in contact with your coach. And hey, if you gain back 5 pounds, just go on Medifast for a couple weeks to kick it to the curb.

I'm not sure what kind of expectations I should have for my first week. Part of me thinks I can do really well if I stick to it perfectly, but the other part of me thinks I can never lose weight because I never have. I've never lost more than... 5 to 10 lbs? And never on purpose. My ultimate ideal goal would be to lose 30 lbs. In a perfect world, of course. So for my first week, I really think I'd be happy with anything more than 2 lbs. If it's less than 2 lbs, I will not be a happy camper. However, I would LIKE to see 4. I think I deserve a big fat 4 ;) I mean, I'll be eating roughly 800 calories a day... That's cutting out a LOT of calories compared to what I am eating now and maintaining my body weight with.

I guess the next thing I should address is why. And why now. Well, this is the first time I've had money since I heard about Medifast/TSFL. I'm getting married in 15 months. I graduate in 4 months. My brother is getting married in 2 months. So many important things that I don't want to look fat in pictures for. I'm sick of being how I am. No, I'm not huge. Yes, I am overweight. Don't tell me I'm not. Medifast is expensive. I won't lie. But so is being fat. And honestly, with eating out and groceries that I was buying before, Medifast really doesn't come out to being THAT much more expensive. The convenience is amazing. I can bring the meals to school or work and eat them quickly.

So my expectations for this week are that I will be unhappy, tired, grouchy, and feel awful. I'm not incorporating any sort of workouts until week 3 when I'm sure I've adjusted to the lower calories. 

Tomorrow morning will be my first weigh in. I'm also going to record my body fat, muscle mass, and inches. That way if I have a non-losing week I can still see other differences. Oh, and I guess a before picture? Ew. I'll post it all here at the end of the day with a summary of how it went. I honestly think day one is going to be easy. It's day two and three I'm concerned about. 

Any questions? =D Wish me luck!